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LOL New York Giants History
The New York Giants '''are currently one of two football franchises in the NY/NJ metropolitan area causing nothing but misery to their fan bases. It is also worth noting the guy writing this is a Giants fan (but i'm not Five Point Vids). 2000's: The beginning of Eli-loyality * 2004 would mark the beginning of the Eli Manning era for New York. * In the 2004 draft, the San Diego Chargers, who had the first pick, were highly interested in Manning. But since it's the Manning family, his dad Archie presumably didn't want Eli in the same conference as his brother Peyton, who was riding hot with the Colts, therefore he made Eli speak out before the draft and say he didn't want to play for San Diego. The Chargers would draft him anyway, and Archie would have to hustle to get what he wanted. The Giants gave in to him and would trade their drafted QB in Philip Rivers and an 05 pick for Manning. ** While this can be considered a LOL moment for the Chargers in trading away a guy who would win 2 superbowls, Rivers would have a more consistent career than Eli. It's a mystery what could have been if the Giants just stayed out of the ordeal and kept Phil. 2010's: One with the derp '''Ben McAdoodoo Tom Coughlin's successor would be Ben McAdoo, he would coach for almost 2 seasons. * The 2016 season actually wasn't that bad, the Giants would finish second in the NFC East with an 11-5 record, but lose to Aaron Rodgers and the Packers in the wild card. * The 2017 season they had even bigger expectations, everything wound up falling apart. ** They would lose the first 5 games of the season and be plagued by injuries, including Beckham who would be out for the season. ** CB Eli Apple also lost his shit from this disaster and be suspended at the end of the 2017 season. Safety Landon Collins would label him a cancer. ** McAdoo's explanation for this failure? Eli Manning! While he was actually on to something by noting Eli was starting to go past his prime, but the solution he offered did not sit well with anyone: Geno Smith. ''' *** Right after benching Eli for him in Week 13, McAdoo and GM Jerry Reese would be immediately fired. the team would finish 3-13 and at the bottom of the NFC. '''Still Derpin' * The next GM would be former Panthers GM Dave Gettleman, a guy who doesn't believe in any analytics and doesn't know that rebuilding and being competitive are 2 different things. ** His choice for the next head coach would be Pat Shurmur, whose last head coaching stint was with the Cleveland Browns where he posted a 9-23 record. Gettleman hired him because "he was the only adult in the room". * You'd expect the Giants to start considering a successor for Eli after that disaster of a season with the second overall draft pick, like maybe draft Sam Darnold or another hot QB rookie. But of course, out of loyalty to the Manning family, the Giants decided to stick with him and just draft the transcendent talent in Saquon Barkley. * The 2018 season would only be slightly better... at 5-11, with it now becoming clearly obvious Eli is reaching his swan song. ** Eli Apple would be traded to the Saints that October. ** Beckham was also fed up with the organization, there were instances of him hitting the locker room before halves ended during games. * The off season however, boy that off season they had, it was something else. ** Start off by trading Odell Beckham Jr. to the Cleveland Browns for couple of draft picks and Jabril Peppers, just one year 'after signing him to a multi million dollar deal. *** By this time, the Giants have now swallowed $200 million in dead cap. *** It was also confirmed management wanted Odell off the team due to his personality problems, then why the hell did you resign him??? ** One positive: the Giants would finally draft a new QB in Daniel Jones, who is actually a good promising QB, but the negative on this: They took him with their first pick when he was projected to be a second or third rounder, they could of used it to draft OLB and Nagurski Trophy winner Josh Allen, whom Jacksonville would draft right after him. Even Coughlin knew who was more valuable. ** The Giants still didn't improve their defense over the offseason, therefore analysts were predicting them to be at the bottom of the NFC, again. * And they were right: The 2019 season was the continuation of nuclear winter ** The Giants would use Manning out of loyalty for 2 games until finally deciding to start developing Jones. ** Interestingly enough, Jones would start showing potential with Eli mentoring him, they'd win their next 2 games (even though one was against the Deadskins and the other one the Buccs fucked up). ** '''And that would be the last game they would win until Week 15. ' ** Green Bay would beat any imaginary play off hopes they had in Week 13, that week: Washington won, Miami won and even 'Cincinnati won. '''The Giants were once again last in the NFC East (dubbed the NFC Least because of how shit it was this season) until the Redskins chose to suck more. ** Shurmur's record with the Giants is now 7-22, that isn't just worse than McAdoo, that's worse than his tenure with the Browns! ** Dan Jones then got injured, so Eli once again had to start for Week 14, the Giants would lose the Eagles. *** This loss also ties a franchise record at 9 consecutive losses, how the hell is Shurmur not axed yet? ** At least Eli got a possible send off in an at home win against the tanking Dolphins in Week 15. ** After finishing the season 4-12 and posting an even worse record than his tenure with Cleveland, Shurmur was fired, Gettleman for some reason kept his job. * Tisch and Mara started arguing about which direction to put the team in. Tisch wanted to fully revamp the office, but Mara just wanted a couple changes, it's worth noting many Giants office personnel have been around for nearly a decade now. Some coaching prospects have seen this as a problem as well, including Ron Rivera, who decided to go to the Red Skins. 2020's: Introducing our new- wait who? * The Giants coaching search candidates included a good number of people, however who was hired left some head scratching and the question if Mara and Tisch were officially out of touch. ** One popular choice was Mike McCarthy, he wound up going to the Cowboys immediately after meeting Jerry Jones. ** The other popular choice was Baylor Coach Matt Ruhle, whom was a member of Coughlin's staff when he was in New York and was preparing to coach in the NFL. However, on the day before his interview, he was interviewing for the Panther's HC opening where they made him an offer he couldn't refuse. ** With the top 2 candidates gone, Giants fans started freaking out as it was reported '''Jason Garrett '(Coach Claps and the Golden Goose of Jerry Jones) '''was contacted for an interview. ** But. He was only asked to be interviewed for Offensive Coordinator, apparently on the same night the Panthers hired Ruhle, the Giants settled on Joe Judge...wait who? *** Judge was apparently the Patriots ST Coordinator for many years and also the WR coach, Belichick spoke highly of him and claimed he was ready for a HC job. Yeah let's just wait a see. Category:NFL Category:New York Category:Giants (Football)